We’ve been through all the usual preliminaries of love
Shared meals, shared a joke, met each others’ relations
Found out we’re compatible in bed, near enough
(With maybe just one or two small reservations.)
So it’s likely there might be a future for us.
And the books say that love means both giving and taking
So I’ll smile all the while and I wont make a fuss
About the great sacrifice that I’ll be making
Chorus
As I go along, though gritting my teeth,
With all your outlandish alternative beliefs
And so dearest darling to show I adore you
I’ll throw out my pinstripes and dress all new agey
I’ll buy you those crystals to help cleanse your aura,
I’ll learn pagan rituals (if they’re not too stagey).
I’ll meditate with you, I’ll practise Tai ch’i,
If you’ll give your heart - and your body - to me
Chorus
And I won’t guffaw at your daft superstitions
When you tell me your visions, I won’t even smirk
Nor hoot with derision at your premonitions
Or mock your convictions that Tarot cards work
I wont go berserk and I won’t hit the ceiling
When you tell me of the benefits of angelic healing
Chorus
We’ll climb up the hillside of Glastonbury Tor
Whose mystico-esoterico-philosophical connections
Will bring us enlightenment, darling, I’m sure
As we trace all its ley lines in every direction
To Tibet, ancient Egypt, to Roma and Napoli -
Where Elvis and Jesus are both living happily.
Chorus
And I’ll come along to your moots & your meetings
I’ll join in your greetings, no matter how gooey
And though rationality’s taking a beating
I’ll shift all my furniture to suit your Feng Shui
I won’t get downhearted, I wont get depressed
When you tell me your life is a Spiritual Quest
But my personal Grail and my meaning of life
Is just that I’m meaning to make you my wife.
Chorus
